Can someone old and wise that has been married for a while give me some serious advice please?

Ok so Me and my husband (who is in the military) have been married for almost 4 years. We got married quick and young (at 18) we are 22 now. We've known each other since elementary school. We have one 2 year old daughter. Hes been deployed twice and I can honestly say we have been fighting the whole 4 years of our marriage. (we have horrible communication skills) I caught him talking to his ex behind my back a couple years ago.. nothing to bad,(it was right after I gave birth to our daughter) masturbating to porn while i was pregnant on the couch, and when we were dating he went to a full nude strip club 3 times to go see a high school friend dance while I was out of town on a senior trip to san juan. I forgave him for those things just recently. I have no problems going to strip clubs with him and watching porn with him while we have sex and just fun things like that. but just recently he came back from deployment and we had a HUGE blowout fight (he was beyond drunk) and we decided he would not drink anymore for a while (he has been to rehab before for alcohol) well he totally ignored that promise he made to me so we started to fight again and I told him to make a marriage counseling appointment. he did... then he had a night out with the boys THAT SAME DAY. he told me he wouldn't be going to a strip club without me. well I checked the bank and he took out 100$ at a local strip club. He then got black out drunk and never came home. I guess he ended up passing out at his friends barracks. So then we had ANOTHER blowout fight and I told him no more drinking. Well he went to florida to go find us another car and see his family he hasn't seen in 2 years ...while I stayed here so I wouldn't miss any school. Last night he went out to a wing place similar to hooters and ended up drinking too much and threw up. He is suppose to be back here tomorrow at 12 so we can go to our marriage counseling appointment ...but its and 11 hour drive and he decided to go to the beach. he told me "don't worry I'll be there" but I somehow don't trust or believe him.. I told him if he didn't show that would be the last straw and I would like to separate. ...anyone please give me some advice. I know I'm not perfect and I am not 100% innocent but I cant help but to feel being walked all over and just not taken seriously. ADVICE PLEASE!